Perceptions
I spent some time last night thinking about this....how do I see myself? How do others see me? And in the same vein how do I look at others and am I seeing what they are portraying, or what my preconceived notion is or a combination? Are they showing their real selves? Am I?
I think what prompted this thought party was when a friend of mine told me that she always thought of me has her hip & trendy (or something to that effect) friend and now I'm about to become a mother. I jokingly replied well all that's out the window then. It got me thinking though - never in a million years would I consider myself "hip & trendy" but at the same time I don't think my innate personality or style will change once the Chick Pea makes his/her arrival. I think I am a dorky, silly, caring, thoughtful, loyal, creative person. Often feeling on the outside looking in, but trying to just do my own thing and being okay with that.
My friend who sparked these thoughts in my head is amazing - I've always thought of HER as this ultra-cool Mom who's up on everything, handles her family (now 3 children + husband + mother + sister + father + various friends, co-workers, etc) with such love & care it blows my mind. SHE is the one who is hip & trendy and can go out and party like a rock star (without all the drugs, of course) and spend the next day finger painting with her girls. I'm constantly amazed by her generosity and thoughtfulness.
At least that's how I see her. :) I wonder sometimes how she sees herself....?
I know there are times when we are forced to put up our "facades" to get through that day, meeting, appointment, show, conference call, family event, etc - and there are times when we can be as bare bones as we need to be; letting it all hang out - by letting the ugly side be exposed. I think balance is good. We probably need to have times when we are on our "best" behavior and times when we aren't.
I'm just rambling. As I was laying in bed and falling asleep last night this was all far more eloquent and thought provoking. But today is a new day and I'm afraid the synapses aren't firing as quickly as I would like them to. But you get the idea...right?
I think what prompted this thought party was when a friend of mine told me that she always thought of me has her hip & trendy (or something to that effect) friend and now I'm about to become a mother. I jokingly replied well all that's out the window then. It got me thinking though - never in a million years would I consider myself "hip & trendy" but at the same time I don't think my innate personality or style will change once the Chick Pea makes his/her arrival. I think I am a dorky, silly, caring, thoughtful, loyal, creative person. Often feeling on the outside looking in, but trying to just do my own thing and being okay with that.
My friend who sparked these thoughts in my head is amazing - I've always thought of HER as this ultra-cool Mom who's up on everything, handles her family (now 3 children + husband + mother + sister + father + various friends, co-workers, etc) with such love & care it blows my mind. SHE is the one who is hip & trendy and can go out and party like a rock star (without all the drugs, of course) and spend the next day finger painting with her girls. I'm constantly amazed by her generosity and thoughtfulness.
At least that's how I see her. :) I wonder sometimes how she sees herself....?
I know there are times when we are forced to put up our "facades" to get through that day, meeting, appointment, show, conference call, family event, etc - and there are times when we can be as bare bones as we need to be; letting it all hang out - by letting the ugly side be exposed. I think balance is good. We probably need to have times when we are on our "best" behavior and times when we aren't.
I'm just rambling. As I was laying in bed and falling asleep last night this was all far more eloquent and thought provoking. But today is a new day and I'm afraid the synapses aren't firing as quickly as I would like them to. But you get the idea...right?
Comments
i've often thought these same thoughts. i had a friend once tell me she thought i was always so calm and in charge - such confidence. it blew me away becuase i see myself as the complete opposite. it's an interesting thing to ponder....
and i know what you mean about things not connecting when you write. on my drive home i often think things through and they sound so good until i get home and attempt to write them out. nothing connects....
and since i'm thinking of it - i see you as this well organized (despite all your blogging to the contrary - I've seen your house - it's neat!) always put together, martha stewarty, intelligent woman. you're incredibly thougtful and kind always doing little projects to brighten up other people's lives. i'm in awe of you. slightly jealous at times. thankful that i know you. being so excited to meet your little one and see you with them :) and now that i've gone on - i miss you!