Naturally Optimistic

Well, after the stolen-grill tantrum, the weekend got better. We spent most of the long weekend in the yard and in the gardens. Steve was finishing up planting his bagillion trees (really, "only" 75 but that's a crapload of trees!) and I spent the days digging up the flower beds and "deweeding" them which really consisted of ripping up the SOD that had replaced what should have just been dirt. Ugh. Okay - Steve helped me with some of that because there was no way I could get some of it up. I planted tons and tons of petunias which are quite lovely. I also transplanted a bunch of tulip bulbs (literally hundreds - ack!), I moved my seedlings (marigolds, sweet william, bellflower and echinachea) from the seed tray to the ground, I transplanted some other bulbs I found in the front (blue bravo?) and ripped out the horrible front flower bed edging (Steve helped with that too). I also planted some wild flowers - I hope they turn out! I got sunburnt yesterday - which...

I'm so angry right now I'm crying - which pisses me off even more. Just got home to find out that some ASSHOLE has stolen our WEBER GRILL (big, charcoal) out of the backyard!!!! It was next to the house - about 70 ft or more from the alley. The yard is FENCED IN WITH A GATE which means that someone had the balls to come in our yard and just cart it away. I CANNOT FUCKING BELIEVE IT. this is not the first incident... Last AugustSteve's truck window was smashed in and cd player/cd's were stolen from it when he was parked over night in the alley. Last October my Dad's mini-van back window was smashed in while parked in the alley (nothing stolen - idiots - it was full of tools!) while we were gone for about an hour IN THE MIDDLE OF A SATURDAY AFTERNOON. (needless to say - no one parks in back any more). And last year my BIKE was stolen OUT OF THE GARAGE while we were working in the g.d. yard. FUCKING BALLSY. I'm so angry. I'm so so so so so so so so fucking angr...

Oh boy…. The thing is…I like to work. I do. I LOVE being busy and getting projects and the sense of accomplishment when they are finished. In my “real” life I am never bored. There is always something to do – reading, taking a hike, working on the film, gardening, washing dishes (there are always dishes), working on a various house project or craft project or whatever….but here? Here I am deadly bored. I loathe being bored. My brain is going a million miles a minute and then just crashes and I fight yawns and heavy eyelids and I watch the minutes tick by on my monitor. It really really sucks. I’ve read all the ‘blogs that I read (which haven’t yet been blocked by my IT department), I’ve scoped out real estate in various cities throughout the US, I’ve figured out my financial situation through December (and MAN am I hoping it changes), I’ve read my usual comics & Dear Abby, I’m out of ideas! Boredom leads to me feeling sorry for myself which leads to posts like the one from th...

Just got back from a viewing (showing?) of the film. Eeeeek. We had 3 people there who had each seen the film previously at least once. They were impressed! The changes have made a difference. The music adds in all the right places and the cinching up and tightening of everything works! I'm so glad. I'm so proud of the work we've done...all the long ass hours, blood, sweat and tears (quite literally). J's pleased too which is a feat that is worth mentioning. There are a few VERY MINOR edit things that I need to "fix" tomorrow and then we make the giant OMF file and it goes off to sound design/mix land - ACK! OMG - my baby is almost grown up?!? 2+ years...... I can't imagine what I'll do with all my free time. (okay - it won't actually be done done til the end of summer most likely - we're still re-shooting the opening titles and then there's the scrounging of money to get some DVD's made so we can start submitting, plan of attack, mark...

Well, I just found a lovely puke log on the bed from one of the cats. It's surrounded by a puddle of liquid...and it's full of some plant matter. Isn't life grand? hmph. (why do we have cats again?)

Sun is shining (for now - storms later) and damn those grasshopper Keebler cookies are delish. I'm in photocopying hell once again at work but I'm trying to remain UPBEAT and positive and start focusing on little ways to change my life to suit me better....we'll see....

I’m trying to stave it off. I swear to God. I’m trying. I’m positive today. The sun in shining (sort of), the temps are good. The grass is sooooo green and our yard is looking fabulous after all the hard work this weekend. I’m wearing short sleeves and I’m not freezing! I’m not tired, hungry, my eyes don’t hurt, I’m not sneezing and have no sinus headache or weird hormonal rollercoaster to ride. But…it’s starting to not work. My incredible optimism is slipping. Thank goodness I only have 50 minutes to go. I’m photocopying today. Yup. That’s it. Photocopying. Well, and refilling the copier with paper (because god forbid anyone else who works here should do it ) and I did some shredding earlier. Shredding . And while I’m doing these less than mundane tasks I try try try to grin and bear it. I try to “accept my station in life” * puke * and that works for a while but then I start losing it. I am a creative, smart, talented person. I have 4 year degree. I graduated magna cum lau...

Well, thankfully the cloud has passed. I think it's partially due to seeing ACTUALLY sunshine coming from the sky!! Yay! I think it's partially due to hormones - but whatever. I'm glad that it has retreated. The weekend was good - ate yummy Sammy's pizza on Friday (delish), worked in the yard all day on Saturday (lawn mowed, weeds weeds weeds pulled, crappy bird bath - gone!), movies were watched (Napoleon Dynamite and Sideways), wine was consumed, the film was worked on and a lovely fettucine alfredo (w/chicken, carrots and corn) was made from scratch. AND THE CAT WALL CAME DOWN!!!! Why is it now that as I sit here I think I smell cat pee. ??? My dining room has never seemed so big. I love it. Love love love it!! Okay -now, back to work. Blech.

Okay - my one television weakness (right now anyway - and not counting shows that involve home improvement, makeovers, dating, weddings or nannies).... The Apprentice . Steve & I are all geared up for the finale. I was rooting for Tana the whole season until last week. Last week she was so arrogant and so nasty about her team (granted, her team was difficult). I thought her task was just a bit more chaotic and not as smooth as Kendra's event. So, I'm rooting for Kendra tonight. We shall see....

...no literally. Well, and figuratively too. *sigh* Duluth right now is in a cloud. So when you go out...it's not exactly raining but you still get wet. You can't see the hill, or the top of the lift bridge even. You can't do yard work. You can't bask in the glory that is spring. And everyone's crabby. Anarchy will reign soon if we don't get some rays of sun. Everyone at work is surly. We need our UV rays!! And I'm on a hormonal-rollercoaster this week. It is really sucking. LOGICALLY I know that at this point in my month - I think irrationally, analyze everything and become a little depressed (for me - which isn't much but damn it still sucks). Journal writing commences. I become needy and clingy and I disbelieve that anyone could ever love me - blah blah blah. *sigh* I hope the sun returns soon. Please.

And because I am a dork... I was very excited to read that last week someone came here by googling "Donald Trump eating pancakes" - hee hee! That made me very happy! ha.

Let me just say that I have confided a few things which are/were embarrassing to me (a little) to a couple of very close friends over the course of the past 2 months or so. It took me a long time to muster up the energy to type (I am lame) what I wanted support with and I felt sort of foolish but thought that my friends would rally around and give me the answers I want or ought to hear. They're stupid things, mostly...things that run in my head...but I really thought I would get something back from them. Now I wonder...hmmm...do I send another email saying HELLO DID YOU GET THAT EMAIL ABOUT MY GENERAL CRAZINESS? Because if they did and didn't reply - I'm a loser. If they didn't and I'm still obsessing over minute details of my life from two months ago - I am also a loser. *sigh*

Yay! Although not on the list*, yesterday was spent gathering the necessary items for hooking up the computer (and therefore iTunes) and the receiver to the stereo. The computer is upstairs in the den and the receiver is directly below in the living room. We've been wanting to figure out how we could hook this up for ages . So we went to Best Buy and asked and as soon as the guy started talking I felt like an idiot. Of course! We got a y-spliter for the computer speakers. We hooked them up to craploads of RCA audio cables and Steve drilled the hole of all holes (after several attempts - where the $#@% was the drill going?!) through the front closet. And today through the baseboard to directly behind said stereo. Voila! We now have tunes upstairs and down. Our music library, CD's (because we have not ONE working CD player in the house) and most importantly SECRET AGENT radio station on iTunes radio. It's so time to have a party. *The list is the unbelievably long list of ...

On such a CRAPPY day like today (if you call 34.5 degrees, windchill of 24 degrees, winds gusting up to 32 mph OFF THE F'ING LAKE and gray skies with intermittent sprinkles and snowflakes IN MAY crappy....) I decided to post these lovely pictures of the tulips in our yard. Photos courtesy of the lovely, talented, hot and fabulous Steve....this day (Tuesday I think?) was crappy too but at least the sun came out long enough for the tulips to open. And it was warm. 68 degrees warm. *sigh* I hate spring.

The tulips and dandelions that live by the garage. 

I love the orange & red tulip. 

Springy spring spring! 

I like to call this one "Three Ladies" - it seems as though they should get up and sing a song. 

Thanks to a fantastic 50% off sale on all General Mills cereals this past Saturday, we are now officially stocked up for breakfast! For a while at least. I am sad to admit that I had a blast picking out so many different kinds of cold cereal yumminess. 

We went to the umpteenth annual Lions Club Pancake... Feed on Thursday. It took up an entire ice rink and there were thousands of people feasting on cakes & sausages. I don't think I've ever seen that many people eating pancakes. They were quite delicious (and I don't really even like pancakes all that much). It was a great meal and we didn't have dishes to do afterwards - and hey - it's for a good cause. After dinner we hiked up a very tall hill to burn off those cakes!

Mmmmm.....pancake heaven.... 

High on LOTS of pancakes (nice framing, huh? yeah, I took that myself. 

Well, I’m really bummed today. Last night I got an email from my Mom saying that she & my Dad are not going to be able to come up Memorial Day weekend as planned. For some reason her jack a** work place gave her Thursday off instead of Friday ! Stupid, huh? The plan was for them to drive up Friday around noon (to miss the traffic through Mpls/St. Paul) and then go back Sunday (also to miss the Monday holiday traffic). It’s a 230 mile drive so coming up on Friday night or Saturday just isn’t worth it. This has been planned for a long time! They kept bugging me about what house project I wanted help with (we decided that we’d finally finish painting the enclosed porch). I had scouted out a couple of hikes that I thought they’d enjoy (NOT like the great sloppy melting-snow-poop-hike of ’04)…we had planned on going to Sammy’s Pizza in Superior and of course having a lovely “happy hour” at home beforehand…and well, it just would’ve been nice. My folks haven’t been up here since October...

The big dilemma of late - which fan will be the best? 

My Fan Fanatic - We've been doing a home consumer test lately on window fans for the upcoming "hot" months. Here we're just being a little silly. We think we have a winner!! 

Friday night had a lovely dinner out with Steve's Mom & her boyfriend - Olive Garden. I hadn't been to the one in Duluth yet (it's only 2+ years old....I don't get out much, do I?). After that...I think was just super tired from the 2 glasses of wine...so went to bed before the Biography of Donald Trump (on A&E) was even over. I am a dud. Saturday - slept in...had lovely breakfast of spam-n-eggs and rolls from Johnson's Bakery (super yum). Yesterday afternoon Steve & ran marathon errands - LensCrafters, Verizon, JC Penneys, Menards, Target, Cub...it took FOREVER....but I am on a familyshare plan, I have a kick ass new pair of Levi's, we delivered a baby gift which was adorable (and wrapped cutely too) and we ate a nice grilled dinner (brats, tater tots, beans) when we got home. DAMN my life is exciting! Last night we visited our friends & their newborn. So cute. I wanted to gobble up her little fingers they were so adorable. And her cheeks! Oh m...