Friday, February 29, 2008

Friday

Daddy & Dahlia


Carrie, Dahlia, Laurie & Kate


Dads & Daughters


Sleeping in



My Sweet Little Angel

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Family Photos

A few photos (courtesy of my Mom) from the past weekend:

Dahlia in her swing:


Dahlia in her new bouncy seat:


The Triplets (outfits courtesy of Auntie Carrie!):

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Weekend Update...a few days late

The weekend was good! Saturday Laurie, Pete & their daughter Kate came up from the cities to visit us and meet Miss Dahlia! It was so much fun to see them. And they brought pizza! Whohoo! They also brought lovely gifts for us - INCLUDING - the fact that Laurie learned how to KNIT to make Dahlia a blanket! I was so touched by this I cannot even tell you. The blanket is beautiful and I'm sure Dahlia will spend many cuddly hours with it (or I will, heh). They even brought us ingredients to make chili, corn bread mixes, desserts and a big ol' lasagna & breadsticks to get us through some more meals. Very thoughtful and VERY appreciated!!

Kate is so cute. She is 2 years and 2 months old and is so much fun. She LOVED Beavis. Couldn't get enough of him and he was mostly okay with that. I loved seeing her talk and to see her interact with both Laurie & Pete. All the playing & silliness - I can't wait for that stage and it really lifted me up.

Dahlia of course enjoyed being cuddled & held and kept her spitting up to a minimum while we had guests (thankfully).

After they left Steve & I putzed around the house - trying to decide if we should go to a movie (couldn't find a sitter anyway) or if we should just lay around as he had a bad cold and I felt like I was getting one. In the end we watched CARS, ate chicken noodle soup and called it a night. Dahlia didn't want to go to bed but once she did (by 11 I think) she slept until almost 4 which was great!

Sunday more putzing and last minute cleaning of things around the house. I ran some errands and made mint-brownies for our "Oscar Party" that we had that night.

My parents arrived around 4 or so and with them they brought oodles of hugs & kisses for Dahlia & more supplies, food, etc for us! My Mom & I thought it would be fun to have an "Oscar Party" so we made hors d'oeuvres and broke out the wine. I even had special "Hollywood" plates. We had sausage puffs, meats & cheeses, crackers, veggies & dip, chips & salsa and the aforementioned mint-brownies. Yum. I could eat junk, I mean dinners like that every night! We watched the Barbara Walters Special, voted on our Oscar ballots and enjoyed the show. We were all fading at the end - Steve went to bed first, followed shortly by my Dad and my Mom and I stayed until it was over and then hurriedly hit the hay.

My parents are awesome. They took the night shifts both nights they were here! Granted she slept until at least 4 each night but man was it nice to be able to sleep. Especially since I'm not feeling that great.

Monday I hung out with my folks in the morning and then headed to the dreaded dentist to get my cavity filled. Ugh. It wasn't that bad but it was awful at the same time. Yuck. I hate it. But I did okay. After that I went into work for a few hours - Dahlia-free! (I tend to get more done when I get a few hours there without her). After work my Mom & I ran some errands and then had dinner at home with my Dad & Steve.

Yesterday was much the same - hanging out, lounging about - LOVING the fact that Dahlia was completely showered with love & attention at every turn. My Mom & I went shopping in the morning. She is a bad influence on me. Or rather...I hate shopping and she can see that I'm in OBVIOUS NEED of certain items and gets me to go and buy them. I bought a Columbia rain coat/shell (desperately needed - for years!), an Easter dress for Dahlia & some tights, a baby gift, a new swimsuit for our CA trip and I think that was it. After shopping we had lunch (at home) and then they packed up and after putting together Dahlia's new bouncy seat they headed for home. It was so awesome to have them here and I miss them already. I wish they lived closer!!!!

Then I napped in the afternoon cause I felt like crap. I had a meeting last night at my office at 8pm so went in around 6 to get a few things accomplished.

It's a slow start for us this morning but we're getting going. Hopefully this cold will be leaving soon. I'm sick of it. Blech.

And now I guess, we're all caught up.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Been busy...

Back with some updates soon!

Saturday, February 23, 2008

ANTM Cycle 10

Why didn't anyone tell me that America's Next Top Model started again last Wednesday?? Don't you know I am in bed before primetime these days? Okay - that's not totally true but almost!

Thank goodness for you tube!

Friday, February 22, 2008

Weekend Plans

I'm very excited because this weekend we're having more visitors!

Laurie and her family are coming to meet Dahlia tomorrow! I'm excited as it's been a while since I've seen Laurie, et. al. and she hasn't been up to visit our house yet. (Laurie, forgive the untidiness...I'm doing what I can! Doh!). We will chat & eat lunch & I will let her fawn over my beautiful daughter and I will fawn over her toddler and the guys will probably be amazed at how much we can talk.

Then on Sunday Grandma & Grandpa R are coming for another visit! Whohoo! We have an "Oscar Party" planned for Sunday night and I will probably get to go to work w/o the wee one on Monday and I might even run to Sam's Club (evil but my Mom needs to go) and Target with my Mom. They're staying til Tuesday afternoon. Yay!

Next weekend Steve's sister Allison & her husband Josh are visiting next weekend (they are expecting in July) and the next thing to look forward to - Steve & I are going to California at the end of March! I just booked our hotel last night. So. Excited. 4 NIGHTS OF UNINTERRUPTED SLEEP. :) Dahlia is staying at Grandma & Grandpa's house.

Now, time to vacuum my living room rug. It's just a "place holder" rug right now til we go shopping but it needs a vacuuming VERY badly!

Friday

I've got nothing but thought I should post....

The blanket I made for Sam's little one, Sydney:


The back of Dahlia's Valentine's outfit from last week:


Dahlia in her Pooh outfit at Grandma & Grandpa's house:

Thursday, February 21, 2008

It's Okay

Everything is okay with Steve's Dad. He had a seizure last night due to being off his anti-seizure meds for a week (mixup between the doc & the pharm or some such nonsense). I was so relieved when Steve came through the door last night with that news.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Steve's Dad

Just got a call from Steve's Dad's GF - he was having an "episode..." slumped over in his chair, breathing, ambulance called. We were at our neighbors. Steve came home, I shortly followed with the wee one. Steve was already getting ready to get out the door and head to the hospital. I don't know anything. Waiting. Hating that. His Mom called me (they're not together) wondering what is happening. I hate this waiting. I feel useless and helpless. Ugh. Hopefully it is nothing but I worry worry worry.

Update

Dahlia seems to be doing just fine today. I'm the only one stressing out I guess. I have been using "the booger sucker-outer thing" (okay bulb syringe) and BOY she loves that! Her nostril is just barely big enough to fit it! I also took her temp for the first time today. I thought it would be more traumatic than it was. She didn't seem to notice or care when I stuck it in her bum (ever so gently!). No fever. Just a paranoid Mama. I picked up some saline drops at the pharmacy but am scared to use them! I'm such wimp. I'll wait til Steve gets home! Hopefully we'll both get more sleep tonight. I could surely use it.

I forgot to mention that yesterday I went to the dentist. UGH. I am an 'anti-dentite' but go religiously every 6 months because the thought of something going WRONG in my mouth freaks me out more than the general discomfort & dislike I have for the dentist office. Michelle's Mom (hi Virginia!) was kind enough to come over and watch Dahlia so I could get my teeth polished & x-rayed in peace. It was so nice to have that little outing - even though it was to the dentist. Thank you very much, Virginia! It was much appreciated. I even stopped for lunch at Arby's (my traditional after-dentist-treat) afterwards and spent a good 20 minutes or so READING my book. It was heavenly. I would've sat there longer but they had PEPSI products. Hmph. Unfortunately this all has a sad ending. I have a tiny cavity that needs to be filled. CRAP. First one in YEARS. Hmph. MY parents will be here on Monday when I go in for the next round of torture.

Sick Baby

I think my baby is sick. She sounds like she has a lot of snot and i can't just tell her to "blow." She also has a wee cough which breaks my heart to hear. There wasn't much in the sleeping department last night...For either of us. I don't know if I should take her in or not. This is all new to me. I don't know if there's anything you can do for a baby with a head cold. I called the nurse and am waiting for a call back.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Home Again, Home Again, Jiggity-Jig



We had a great time this weekend at Grandma & Grandpa R's. Dahlia was really great in the car. Nary a peep out of her on the way down...of course she then kept Grandma up til 3am but hey - at least we made it! Saturday she got to meet her Great Aunt Ronnelle, her 1st-cousin-once-removed Lindsay and her 2nd cousin Gavin along with her Great-Grandparents. It was cool! Mom & Dad (ie: us) got 2 WHOLE NIGHTS OF SLEEP as my parents were on night duty (HALLELUJAH!) plus we got to go skiing at the Nature Center, ate lots of yummy home cooked meals + Godfather's Pizza and did I mention TWO WHOLE UNINTERUPPTED NIGHTS OF SLEEP?!?! It was heavenly. I have never gone to bed with as big of a smile on my face as I did Friday night. :)

AND - guess what? Saturday Dahlia slept from 9pm til about 5am!!!!!! I couldn't believe it! Of course that hasn't been repeated (yet) but it gives me oodles of hope!


4 Generations


Great Grandpa B with Dahlia - they have the same birthday 86 years apart!


The boys! Joshua & George (2 of the 3 triplets!! So big!!!!)


Cousins meet for the first time! Dahlia, Joshua, George & Hannah!

Friday, February 15, 2008

Looks Like Someone Else Wants to go to Grandma & Grandpa's House

Packing...

So my latest dilemma. Packing for the 250 mile road-weekend trip to Grandma & Grandpa's house. Ay yi yi...how many outfits? Hats? Onesies? Diapers? Remember the formula, the zantac, the Mylicon drops; Toys? Pacifiers? Bottles....

And Steve & I have a hell of a time just getting out the door the TWO of us...this could be very interesting....

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Service

Great Aunt Marian's Memorial service was this morning. Steve & I and Dahlia drove up to Eveleth. I think it was good that we went. We got to see some of Steve's family who had yet to meet Miss Dahlia and it was nice to be apart of remembering Marian. At the reception afterwards we were amazed by the number of church members/friends of Marian's who stopped by to coo over how cute Dahlia was and to tell us that Marian was SO EXCITED to meet the baby that she kept talking about it (both before and afterwards) for weeks. That really made me feel good. I'm so glad that Dahlia got to spread a little sunshine in this world even though she's so young.

Marian's actual funeral & burial will be later this spring/summer when more family members are able to attend.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Crosswalk Madness

This is brilliant! I always knew people from Austin, Minnesota were creative. This makes great use of the tunnel connecting Austin High to the "annex" across the street (for those not familiar with Austin...) - enjoy! (thanks to my Dad for alerting me to this video - go Dad!)

Back to Reality


The past couple of days have been great. Having my Dad here was just awesome. He's so good with Dahlia and it's so nice to have an extra set of hands around the house so we can just do general putzing...like making more formula & washing bottles. He also took the 4am feeding each morning which was INCREDIBLE. AND the 7:30 or 8:30 feeding so I got to totally sleep in - awesome! I'd get up to check on them and he'd say - go back to bed. I seriously wish he could move in!!!

Dahlia was on her almost best behavior when Grandpa was here...Sunday night she went to bed at 8:30pm with no problems! She slept until 1am!! Last night she went down at 9:00pm (again no problems), I fed her from 10:30 til 11:30 or so and then she slept until 4am!! It was awesome! I woke up at 3:30 in a total panic because she hadn't woken up yet. Of course I had to sneak in her room to make sure she was still breathing. Luckily I didn't wake her up.

My Dad brought food with him and ingredients to make yet another meal (which we'll have tonight!); he brought some triplet hand-me-downs from my sister and some yummy muffin batter (from her) and most of all he brought love and peace of mind. It was truly awesome. I only wish we lived closer.

We'll see my folks on Friday! We're planning on driving to Austin after Steve gets off work on Friday afternoon - our first BIG car trip with the wee one (250 miles). I hope it goes smoothly!! I can't wait for Dahlia to meet my Grandma & Grandpa, my Aunt Ronnelle & my cousin Lindsay and her 8 month old, Gavin.

Basically? I love having things to look forward to!

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Great Aunt Marian



Steve's Great Aunt Marian passed away this morning. We were planning on visiting her again this afternoon. She told Steve last fall that it was her "life's wish" to see him hold his child. Needless to say we went to visit her only a couple weeks after Dahlia was born.

She was a sweet woman who I only got to meet a handful of times. It really warmed my heart to see how happy seeing Dahlia made her.

Rest in peace, Marian.

Saturday, February 09, 2008

Alone

I am alone in the house for the first time in 8 weeks and 1 day. It is quiet. It is still. It will not last (Steve is picking up Dahlia from Grandma's as we speak).

We tried to go skiing today - it's bloody cold out though. Warm enough this morning (27 degrees) but the arctic air mass moved through and now it's windy and blustery and COLD. Ugh. We got a teensy way onto the trail and turned around - screw that! Instead we hiked in Chester which is much more protected instead. Much better but still cold. Both Steve & I are CRABBY and I think the baby is crabby too. We're going to have Sammy's Pizza for dinner...hopefully that'll ease the crabbiness around this place. I hate being crabby.

Tomorrow Dad arrives - YAY! And next weekend we're journeying to Austin - yay! My Mom has even offered to take Dahlia's overnight shift next Friday - I am already dreaming about dreaming!

Friday, February 08, 2008

I'm not completely crazy....yet

Today is a little bit better...mostly because whenever I have thoughts of THINGS THAT MUST BE DONE I push them out of my head and move on to something else...like washing more bottles. Right now? Little Miss is in the bathroom in her bouncy because she LOVES to fall asleep in there while I take my shower and really? Why should I move her? If she's good, I'm good, right?

As far as the last couple of posts...I don't know what my problem is. I will say it a million times over. It's not that I'm overly worried about housework or that crap - I've never really kept that tidy of a house anyway. It's not that I'm DYING to go back to work - just that I feel pressure to keep things afloat so I can, you know, continue to have an income and not go into the poorhouse. I *don't think* I'm trying to be SuperMom but I'm sure I'm trying a little bit. I think it's a combination of not knowing what I'm doing + not enough sleep + cranky baby (somedays - yesterday - sheesh) + just life changes in general.

I did make a list (Laurie - thanks for the reminder - boy do I love lists!) but it mostly included things like "wash bottles," "make formula," "cry," and "try not to be such a failure"....so I might need some work on that front.

I just feel.....bleh. I look at her and she's beautiful but I don't feel as connected as I should feel. I don't want to put on an act and be all "my baby is the most wonderful thing ever" because...I don't KNOW her. I am sure I will get to that point and I'm sure as soon as she smiles at me or acknowledges that I'm her mama and I can bring her comfort it will change but right now it's just tough.

So many people have said to me over the past weeks that these first 3 months are like torture...or boot camp...or just plain miserable. My Mom, my sister, my friends, my cousins....I guess when I thought about "how hard" being a Mom would be...I didn't really have a clue. I'm geared up for fun learning activities, hikes in the woods, nutritious meals, dressing in silly clothes and dancing in the kitchen...but all this first stuff I sort of suck at. So much for my grand entrance into motherhood.

And she's 3 1/2 weeks early so 3 months is closer to 4 months...*sigh* I will get through it...I know I will I just can't believe how totally lame I am at all of this.

SuperGrandpa (my Dad) is coming up on Sunday for a couple of days and I am THRILLED. He is going to stay with us and even take on some nighttime duty. I may just have to imprison him in our 'office.' I can't wait!

Thursday, February 07, 2008

Whiner

I'm not trying to be such a whiner. I just feel like this is one of the only outlets I have. I really appreciate everyone's comments.

Anxiety

Today is one of those days. A day where I laid in bed before getting up with my mind racing with all the things I have to do and all the ways I'm failing at them in my life. Not just baby/parenting stuff but my business stuff, my household stuff (not cleaning - bills, upkeep etc), my wife stuff - it sucks. I feel completely immobilized and totally traumatized by all these THINGS that I need/should/want to be doing. I fear for my company because I have not been good at manning the helm. I miss time spent with my husband and although I know that will change it makes me worried. I have so much to do and can't seem to accomplish one single thing.

I think maybe if I were better disciplined I could do it. Or maybe if I were stronger and less whiny I could suck-it-up and get what needs to be done, done...but because I am captain of my own ship these days I just sit here in a whirlpool spinning round and round and not moving anywhere at all.

There are undelivered Christmas presents on my piano. There is paint on the kitchen cabinets that needs to be touched up (for almost 2 years...doh). There are two films in the can that no one will see until they're finished. There are hospital bills to be paid and checking accounts to be balanced (ay yi yi) and yet I sit here....

I feel like the loose ends are unraveling.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

He's the Cheese to My Macaroni*

4 years ago today I met Steve. Well, I "met" him through Match or Yahoo or both a few weeks prior and we did the emailing back & forth thing for a while to 'get to know' each other...but it was 4 years ago today that we met up for a beer at a little bar/cafe called Nutty Megs in downtown Duluth.

Our relationship has far outlasted Nutty Megs but it was our starting point. We drank beer & chatted and it was easy. It was so wonderfully easy. And he was cute. We closed the place down and headed next door to Pizza Luce for some more beer & conversation. We closed that place down too.

When we left, we hugged and made a tentative date for two days later to go cross-country skiing...we did and the rest, as they say, is history.

I love you Steve! I'm so grateful that you came into my life.

*or maybe I'm the cheesy one...

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

Progressing Backwards?

Last night was not good. I think I jinxed myself by asking for 6 or 7 hours of uninterrupted sleep. We switched Dahlia's formula yesterday because we just can't afford to keep her on the liquid kind. Oh I wish we could. So we went from Similac Sensitive RS to Similac Sensitive (no RS). She drank it just fine and had minimal spitting up in the night which was great...but she only slept for about TWO HOURS AT AT A TIME! What's up with that? She would wake up screaming & hungry - well, one time there was a messy diaper.... I thought I would lose my mind last night. Steve had the "night off" as he was exhausted and I was up at 11:45 (went to bed at about 10), 1:30 til 2:20; 4:00 til 5:20 and 6:30!!! WTF? It was awful. My mind is so mushy when the sleep is that little that I get aggravated at her and I know it's not her fault. It is just so hard to go for so long with so little sleep. I fed her at 6:30 and brought her into bed with me...I put her on her tummy (next to my head) and she slept off and on for a couple hours. I caught a few zzzz's but was so paranoid about her being on her tummy that it wasn't that relaxing. Now she's sleeping like a champ in the bouncy - slept through my shower, blow drying my hair, getting ready, etc. What gives?

I'm reading the Health Sleep Habits book and it suggests starting at 6 weeks to put your baby to bed in the crib EARLY - at 7pm early and the more sleep they get the happier they are - obviously they will still wake up a couple times to eat. Well, we tried that last night with ZERO success. She screamed bloody murder so I feel like a failure. Of course she is a little off I think developmentally because she came a bit early. I guess I am impatient! *sigh* Parenting is hard.

Monday, February 04, 2008

Cupcake

No Longer a "Newborn"

According to the nurse practitioner we saw several weeks ago, a "newborn" has that classification until 28 days after birth...or if the baby is born early (like Dahlia at 3 1/2 weeks early) she's a 'newborn' until 28 days after her due date. That is today! So as of tomorrow I guess I no longer have a newborn. Such a milestone, eh?

That being said - she's still a peanut and is barely now fitting into her newborn wardrobe. I think it'll be a while til we move up to the next level...although with the way she's been eating lately it could be sooner than I think!

Saturday, February 02, 2008

Fresh Air

Today was good...well, we started off slowly (as we usually do) but managed to leave the house and drop off Miss Dahlia at Grandpa's house and go for a lovely 2 hour hike. The weather was perfect - 30 degrees or so, no wind, really nice. We hiked from Lester Park (along 7 Bridges Road) to Hawk Ridge. It was very nice. We would've skied today but the trail conditions are crap due to the ice and no fresh snow. I was fine with walking though. It felt really really good.

Tonight Steve's brother came over and we're making a pork stir fry for dinner. It's 7:25 and I'm alternatively starving and exhausted...bed sounds good about now but I will try to soldier on through at least 9:30 (Dahlia's next feeding).

Tomorrow - "brunch" with my honey (at home), visiting a great aunt, watching a bit of the SuperBowl while eating chili-cheese nachos and possibly* going to a movie. I love weekends.

Friday, February 01, 2008

7 Weeks!



When do the smiles come? I need some smiles! I mean I REALLY need some smiles!!!!!